just to clarify, since i have friends who read this blog: my last text post was about this chick at a party who was trying to upset me by calling me ***’s ex-girlfriend (because i have no name and have achieved nothing else worthy of note) now, my breakup, aside from being none of her goddamn business, is not something i want to explore in detail at a party in front of people i barely know....
hey oh guess what? bitch, my hands are...
didney-worl-no-uta: I went over to the Yelp! page of Amy’s Baking Company and oh my god NOOSE BURGER
as much as i hate hyperventilating over romantic uncertainties, i gotta admit that it’s nice to have something to get all fluttery about. oh gosh, i hope he likes me too
i know i should play it cool but i just wanna cook...
so this kid from germany added me on facebook because we have the exact same name. he just liked EVERYTHING on my wall so i look like a self obsessed weirdo. he’s apparently pure evil and is now trying to chat me up in spanish and mandarin. i think i’m being troll’d?
customer: yeah can you guys set aside a copy of that Ryan Gosling movie, the Place Close to the Pines for me? thanks.
me: uh actually I can't, that movie is still in theaters.
customer: yeah like, no, it isn't actually, I checked online and I couldn't find it anywhere.
me: well, maybe that's because you got the movie title wrong? it's called the Place Beyond the Pines
customer: yeah, that's what I looked for. The Place Next to the Pines. it's pretty bad that you're not like, informed about these things, you guys should carry it. there's Ryan Gosling in it.
me: excuse me, but when films are pulled from theaters they are not instantly available for purchase, it usually takes a few months. also, I am online right now and the Place *Beyond* the Pines is playing at seven different cinemas in our area.
customer: what? i looked like, everywhere! how did you find that out?
me: um, i used google.
// customer hangs up //